Money, Money, Money, Money....

MONEY may make the world go around, but it can also bring it to a screeching halt. I think I have mentioned it before that if you were to ask Dick what our "problem" was, he would tell you that it was mostly about MONEY. He would never mention the fact that he had lots of it, but liked to cry poor mouth. For example: during the winter months, the highest he would allow the heat to be at was 65 degrees. When we would have people over they were always sure to dress appropriately...turtle necks and sweaters. Once it was even suggested that I pass out blankets at the front door as people arrived. For the summertime we had central air...one might think... brrr.... how nice... and one would be wrong. Never, ever, was anything lower than 72degrees acceptable. I could never quite grasp the reasoning behind it. It was perfectly okay to keep the house at 65 degrees in the winter, but in the summer 65 was never going to happen. Just as 72 was fine for the warm weather, that number never appeared on the thermostat through the winter months. If I ever complained about it I got "Fine, you want to pay the bill? Then turn it up (or down depending on the season). I'd be more than happy to hand you the bill when it comes." Apparently he thought that I didn't know heat and air conditioning cost MONEY. I learned early on to just keep my mouth shut and put on another sweater. Thank God for menopause. Its pretty sad when you look forward to a hot flash so your teeth will stop chattering! But that time of life made the summers almost unbearable. I had more fans running 24-7 than we had rooms! I could never understand why Dick didn't complain about the electricity I was using to run all of them. Perhaps he somehow sensed the danger in going there. I did have my limits.

Our living room furniture was purchased when we were first married and it, like us, was falling apart. The cushions had no "cush" left in them and our cats had used every piece as a scratching post at one time or another.New furniture was out of the question. Why, you ask? Well, I'll tell you, but you've probably already guessed the answer...MONEY. "Why spend the MONEY on new furniture only to have the cats tear it up too?" Dick said...and again, I quote "Might as well just flush that MONEY right down the toilet."

There are many other things I could mention to prove my point about Dick being a tight wad, but I think you get the picture. When Dick says that our problems were mostly about MONEY he is referring to my credit card debt. He has convinced himself that my hiding the fact that I ran up a ten to twelve thousand dollar balance on my credit card was just as deceitful as him having an affair. I know...the man's a fool...but he truly felt that way and still does. I guess you could say that his view on whats more important in a marriage is a little skewed.

Six years of dating, twenty five years of marriage and it all comes down to MONEY. The Almighty Buck! The one thing that Dick values above all else. "We" are reduced to fighting over who gets what, how much and for how long. It's all so very, very sad, and its killing him to have to part with half of "his" MONEY. I am sure that Dick feels I am trying to take him for everything he's got. But the truth is I'm just trying to survive. He never realized that as married couple everything belonged to "us". Perhaps that's because there never really was an "us". To him it was always "you" and "me". We were supposed to be together for life. It wasn't supposed to be like this. We were supposed to live "Happily ever after". This divorce has cost a lot more than just MONEY so far, and its not over yet.

All that being said, I will leave you with a conglomeration of phrases about MONEY.

Put your MONEY where your mouth is and talk to the MONEY Man so you can make a bundle of MONEY. Time is MONEY and you want to be right on the MONEY and In the MONEY. Then you can rake in the MONEY. Because, if you have a ton of MONEY then you’ll have Money to burn . When Money is no object Money is power .
MONEY talks, MONEY makes MONEY and MONEY makes the world go round .

But, MONEY is also the root of all evil and MONEY can't buy you love. Because MONEY isn't everything and MONEY doesn't grow on trees.

Some people have more MONEY than sense or spend MONEY like water. You'd better get your MONEY's worth, get the best that MONEY can buy. For a Fool and his MONEY are soon parted. So make sure you get a MONEY back guarantee and then take the MONEY and run. Take plastic MONEY pin MONEY, old MONEY, new MONEYY, mattress MONEY, managed MONEY, mad MONEY, hush MONEY, glove MONEY, front MONEY, funny MONEY, found MONEY, folding MONEY, even MONEY, easy MONEY, blood MONEY and seed MONEY. Don’t forget to sock your MONEY away. Maybe put it in a MONEY market account. Then you’ll have more MONEY than God and people will think you are made of MONEY.

Above all, remember…MONEY changes everything, MONEY can’t buy happiness, and you can’t take it with you...unless you have a good lawyer. And that you can take to the bank!